[Scene: Central Perk, the cast of Friends along with Conan O'Brien are sitting and talking.]Conan: It's a tradition here on Friends after
every taping for me to hang out with you guys, (They all laugh) talk down the episode umm… The point of this whole thing is what people see in America is: they see Friends, they love the show, it looks like a smooth
running machine, but behind the scenes there's deceit, mistrust, and hate. And I thought, I thought we'd actually take a look at uh, y'know some of these moments where you guys are—there are mistakes. You make mistakes.
Jennifer: Once and a while.
Lisa: From time to time.
Conan: For example, I don't have to memorize lines. You guys actually have to remember what to say and you probably forget from time to time. Yes?
Matthew: Our energy just comes way up when there's an audience here, and when that happens, something happens between your brain and your mouth sometimes and it just doesn't, it just doesn't work.
[Cut to
Central Perk, Ross, Phoebe, Monica, and Chandler are there. I think it's The One With The Joke.]
Ross: Uh, oh-oh, umm no you didn't. I did.
Chandler: Oh uh-uh, no-no-no-no-uh-uh. (He starts laughing, causing
everyone else to laugh.)
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, Phoebe is talking. It looks like when Rachel and Monica lived in this apartment.]
Phoebe: So, we realize that—Oh no… (She resets herself) I'm telling it! I'm
telling it… (She loses it.)
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Joey is talking to Monica and Chandler.]
Joey: Ha-ha. Look—Come on, I don't know what to do…or say. (He laughs.)
[Reset]
Joey: Ha-ha, very funny. I
don't know what to do! Y'know? Holy crud!
[Reset]
Joey: Ha-ha-ha, very funny. Look, I don't know what to do!
(Long pause, as everyone cracks up.)
Courtney: It is one of those days!
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Phoebe is speaking Italian to Joey's grandmother. I'm spelling phonetically.]
Phoebe: 'Xcusa seniora, voulez-bere quakay—[Beep]—uck it!
Matt: Wow Pheebs, you-you speak gutter?
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Conan: You still get nervous everybody just before a show?
Matthew: Absolutely.
Lisa: Everybody.
Courtney: It's amazing, like all week long we've-we've been saying the
same lines and then the audience is here and we will mess up, and if you mess up once then you'll get nervous because you'll—you know you'll probably mess up again.
[Cut to Central Perk, first season Monica is talking.]
The Director: Action!
Monica: (holding her hand in front of her face) When you were little you slept through-through the Grand Canyon.
The Director: Watch again that hand.
Courtney: This'll be five/ten takes.
The Director: Okay.
Courtney: Okay. You know it's gonna happen.
The Director: Once again, and action!
Monica: (the hand's
still there) When-when you were little you slept through the Grand Canyon. (She actually itches her nose this time.)
Courtney: Oh! Okay! I'm gonna try it without the coffee cup 'cause I think it's the left hand
that's messing me up.
[Reset]
Monica: When you were little you slept through the Grand—(Pointing again)—Oh fffff….
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Monica and Phoebe are talking.]
Monica: Sorry,
let's go back! 'Cause you've got more to say.
Lisa: Do I? Absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah, that's your fault. I…say.
(They both laugh.)
Lisa: I love you.
Courtney: I love you! (They hug.)
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Conan: But there must be, there must—are a lot of moments over the years where you're just trying to do your job, something goes wrong.
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, Joey is
giving Chandler the bracelet from season 2.]
Joey: Hey and, this is a little extra something for y'know, always being there for me.
(Suddenly there's a noise off stage and the camera on Joey swings
around.)
Matthew: Hey Joey! The camera hit our wall!
Matt: What?!
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Joey are living here and Ross is writing on the Magna-Doodle when Rachel opens the door causing the
door knob to hit his hand.]
David: Ahh! Sh—(Beep)—it that hurt!
Jennifer: Are you okay?
[Reset]
[When he hears Jennifer try to open the door he jumps back, and Jennifer is unable to open the door
this time.]
[Cut the hallway, Rachel is exiting from Monica's when the door closes on her skirt.]
Chandler: Hey Rach!
(She breaks up and goes back into Monica's.)
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, with the giant
entertainment center. Joey is exiting from his room.]
Joey: Oh yeah? Then how come I keep—(He notices that the marker board they use has been left on the entertainment center and holds up his discovery.)
[Cut
to Monica and Chandler's, first season, Monica is making a giant sub-sandwich and is talking to Rachel. I think it's The One With the Fake Monica.]
Monica: It was so wild! We told 'em we were the Gundersons in 16…
(Jennifer starts laughing.)
Courtney: (laughing) I spit on her!
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Jennifer: (to Lisa) Operation. You had a fun one.
Lisa: Oh yeah!
Jennifer: With Operation.
Conan: It was a little game. Yeah, with an electric buzzer.
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, The One With George Stephanopoulos, Phoebe is showing Monica and Rachel that she brought
Operation to their slumber party.]
Phoebe: Oh-ooh, and I brought Operation, but umm I lost the umm… (It starts buzzing) It's making a noise.
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Lisa: But le Blanc really doesn't mess up much.
Conan: You don't verbally mess up, but sometimes physically? You mess up.
Matt: I have had some clumsy moments, I guess you can call 'em.
[Cut to Central
Perk, to the theme from The Dick Van Dyke show Joey runs into Central Perk carrying a stack of Soap Opera Digests and falls on the step. He does bounce right back up making it all that much funnier.]
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Lisa: He fell down once! And we re-did it and we went back. And he—(laughs)—he was afraid he was gonna fall down…
Conan: You could actually see him trying not to fall down.
[Cut to Central Perk, same as before Joey is entering.]
Joey: Pheebs! (He looks down as he goes down the step to make sure he didn't fall again.)
Check it out! (He starts laughing when he realized what he did.)
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Courtney: This particular time when he continued to fall or y'know, try not to fall, I was in the room with
Matthew and Matthew was like, "Should I do it?"
[Reset from before, Matt doesn't fall or look down.]
Joey: Pheebs! Check it out! Check it out! Check it out! Check it out! (Hands her one.)
Phoebe: Ooh,
Soap Opera Digest! (As she's saying that Joey is trying to pull out a chair and sit down, only Matthew comes running in from off camera and dives for the same chair.)
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Conan:
Matthew, you have a reputation with the rest of the cast that sometimes you like to, you like to fool around a bit. I mean like if something's naturally going wrong you like to get in there and juice it a little bit.
True or false?
Matthew: I don't necessarily like to juice things…
Courtney: He said true or false!
[Cut to Monica's restaurant kitchen, it's the episode where Joey is working as a waiter at Monica's restaurant.
Joey is patting her breast from when she set it on fire.]
Joey: Oh! Ooh-ooh!
Monica: What are you doing?!
Joey: You're still a tiny bit on fire there.
Monica: Oh geez! Okay! Thanks! (Matthew runs in and
starts patting the other breast, then walks away. Matt slowly stops patting her breast.)
[Cut to that same kitchen, only this is The One With The Proposal, Richard is telling Monica something.]
Richard: It was great seeing you the other night.
Monica: Well, it was good to see you too. Did you come down here to tell me that?
Richard: Noo! I came down here to tell you something else. I came here to tell
you I still love you. (Suddenly the door flies open and in walks Chandler!!)
Chandler: What the fu—(beep)—ck are you doing?!
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Conan: Now you guys work with animals a lot. You
had to work early on with a monkey…
Jennifer: That damn monkey.
Conan: That damn monkey.
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, The One Where The Monkey Gets Away, Rachel is watching a soap opera with Marcel.]
Rachel: Okay. Okay, see now the one with the feather boa? That's Dr. Francis. She used to be a man. Oh look! There—(Marcel (Katie) jumps away)—Okay. (And runs behind her on the back of the couch for a little while.)
Jennifer: Katie. Geez! See Katie, come here—Katie! (Katie spills some popcorn.) Katie, come here Katie. (She obeys and sits where she's supposed to.) Very good.
[Reset, they're about to start the scene when Katie
suddenly jumps up startling Jennifer.]
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Jennifer: Lisa's laugh though…There's—It's so infectious. It's one of those things…just forget about it. Once it starts, it's all gone.
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, it's actually Joey and Rachel's. Phoebe is trying to convince Rachel to switch with her and live with Monica as Joey looks on.]
Rachel: No y'know, I don't want to switch! Come on! I
can throw wet paper towels here!
Phoebe: Well at Monica's you can eat—(Suddenly cracks up.)
Lisa: Okay, shh yeah. 'Cause it's not silly.
The Director: Here we go.
Jennifer: Okay.
The Director: And…action!
Rachel: No-no Ph-Ph-Ph-Ph… (She starts laughing.)
[Reset]
Jennifer: (to Lisa) Ready?
Lisa: Yeah. (They all start laughing.)
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Conan: And then it just builds on
itself and there's no doing the scene after. I mean you probably wait and really get it together and do it.
David: For me, I have a hard time with le Blanc in particular. When-when—I mean when…
Conan: (to Matt) You bastard. Matt: Yeah, what did I do?
David: …I keep a straight face he-he delivers like this look, a reaction to you, or a certain take, I-I—I mean I find it so funny.
[Cut to Monica and
Chandler's, Ross is eating breakfast with Joey and Monica. Joey is walking towards Ross.]
Joey: Mornin'
Ross: Mornin' (Joey hugs Ross's neck and has a look of complete contentment on his face which,
after a short while, causes David and Matt to start laughing.)
[Cut to Monica and Chandler's, Monica is throwing a party. Joey is talking to Ross about the bad audition he just had while pouring booze onto a
snow cone.]
Joey: I mean what kind of an actor, what kind of an actor can't even say, "Hmm, noodle soup?" (David smiles.) Matt: That's a good one? (They both laugh.)
David: Now, we should go back and take the other line.
Matt: Okay, I'll just put a little more booze on there. (Pours some more on.)
Ross: I think, subconsciously…
Joey: (cracking up) Nope, you lost me.
[Reset, Joey is about to pour more booze on.]
David: No! Come on!
[Cut to Joey and Rachel's, Joey and Ross are giving Phoebe and Rachel the bride's maid test.]
Joey: Okay, the next situation is for Rachel. The wedding is about to start, you walk into the back room and you find Monica taking a nap with Ross. (Ross lies on the floor.) I'll be Monica. Go! (He jumps down and
cuddles up with Ross.)
Ross: (jumping up) No! No! No! (David and Matt just lose it then.)
[Cut back to the cast and Conan.]
Conan: We'll be right back with more Friends, less me.
[Cut to Monica and
Chandler's, Courtney and Matthew are getting ready to do a scene where Monica's sick.]
Courtney: I'm doing my brother.
Matthew: That's…gross. Commercial Break
